I can't remember her exact words but the gist of them murmured in a gently

I can't remember her exact words, but the gist of them, murmured in a gently chiding tone, was that we shouldn't ever expect novels to be fair. Something about the way that he punishes some while rewarding others struck me as unjust. At that point, Fay Weldon put me right. Let me know how you get on.Aunt Agatha will be back soon More from Miles Kington. A few weeks ago, a scientific paper in Nature reported that men enjoyed retribution more than women. They've done brain scans to prove it, apparently, revealing that while both sexes show empathy for the suffering of others, men take a particular pleasure when just deserts are handed out. As it happened, that finding chimed intriguingly with a bad bout of esprit d'escalier I was going through. It originated in a discussion of Augusten Burroughs's novel Sellevision on Saturday Review, the Radio 4 arts programme I present, and during which I'd ventured the thought that Burroughs was guilty of a certain amount of favouritism with regard to his characters.

It's never too late.Dear Jack,I am sorry to hear that you are still obsessed with the idea that you might always sound so dreary on the Today programme, droning on and on about Iran or Palestine. I am afraid to say that constant practice on the Today programme may not be the answer. Have you thought about not going on the Today programme at all? This might give a lot of pleasure to a lot of people, and therefore do you a lot of good.Dear Hilary,Hello again All right, if you are still worried, here is another idea Make it all seem Tony's fault Blame him for walking out at the wrong moment Get him to see that he has to take responsibility some time Try tears, if you like. In the old days, you would have been thought young for a statesman Churchill was your age when the war started Roosevelt was over 60, too.

I am sure they will not go back as far as the 1964 Tokyo Olympics. It will never occur to them to think that you were involved in anything And do not worry about being thought too old. After Mark and Simon, I am sure people will be trying to dig up dirt on you as well That is par for the course. When you have published your memoirs, people think you are dead, or at least permanently retired. It will make it even harder to get back on the showbiz circuit of things like The News Quiz etc, in which you were so good before. There may be life after death, but there is not much life after memoir time Think of John Major Think of Bill Clinton.Dear Ming,Just keep your nerve. All leading politicians like to do it when they retire, and, when you have got personal problems as well, it is even more tempting to spill the beans A word of warning, though.

Very often the greatest dangers come from colleagues we least suspect, as I was always telling Margaret Eyes in the back of your head, that's my tip Kenneth Norman Malcolm A few names to remember Especially Norman.Dear Hilary,Nice to hear from you again I am sorry you are still upset To cheer you up, just think how much worse it could be. In the past, people have had to be rushed into Parliament from their hospital bed, even from their death bed, to make sure a Bill got through. Can you imagine the fuss it would cause if someone died like that? While all you have done is cause the death of one or two minor clauses! So, relax.Dear Charles,Yes, I am sure it is tempting to sign a lucrative contract to do your autobiography. Yes, I know, I know - in the right circumstances, hiccups can kill! But you are not dead, are you? You are still in the job, are you not? At least, you were at the time of writing! So, just relax!Dear David,It is a pleasant change to get a letter from an MP who is worried because he has no problems. You seem to be getting the better of your main rival at work, Tony.